Sunday, May 05, 2013

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday my dear little one!
Though this day was not the one we were marking our calendars to, it is the day that the LORD said you would be celebrated and HE would be glorified!
Of all the things that i would love to give and do with you, none compare to the gift you have now received, time with the FATHER. 
Dear son, your daddy prayed for you this morning, that you would bask in the FATHER's glory, and now you are! Of all the things we dreamed of doing with you as you grew here in our hearts, arms and lives, you get to do the one thing we would have only been able to tell you about, and dream with you.
i have peace now, my dear son. You see, for the last several days, i needed to let go of you, but the sliver of hope that had me holding on, would not let that happen. 
The midwife never called with the lab results, and in my heart i knew. . . i knew it was time to say goodbye. 
With one breath i prayed GOD's will to be done AND that HE not let this happen. HIS plan and timing are perfect and though it doesnt make any sense, and i cry "Why?!" it doesnt change the unchangeable GOD we serve or HIS goodness. 
So dear one, your daddy and i name you Enoch Barnett-
Enoch: Dedicated, Consecrated
Barnett: Nobleman, Leader
Enoch, you got your name from a man in the Bible, i hope you will talk to! His testimony is that, he walked with GOD and then was no more. GOD took him away in a time that GOD thought best. Like you, his family had no warning or time to talk with him before he was gone. . . But they had faith in GOD. He had left his mark on their hearts with his love and dedication to the ONE who had formed him from the beginning. Enoch, now you get to walk, talk and be with that ONE who has been and always will be. HE will be able to tell you how much i love you- it is because of HIM i can love, but HE knows a depth of love i will have to wait to find out.
Your daddy wanted to be able to teach you how to skateboard, i am not sure they have those in heaven, but if they do, you will have to show him the best spots when we get there. 
Everyday we will think about you and what you may be doing or how big you would be, or what you looked like. We will remember you with celebration on the 5th of May and look forward to the day of  our reunion in heaven. Know my son that we love you. We are thankful for you and each day we had you here with us. 
Letting go is hard, it only makes it doable because of WHO i am letting you go to... Rest in HIM as i am.
Love always, your momma

5 comments:

Delighting in Jesus said...

We're praying for y'all! Happy birthday, Enoch. :)

Rest in the Lord Who's strength is unending. ♥ u!

Joyfully His,
Alexis

Maddox on the move said...

Oh Erin and Jon, I am praying for you. You have such a good heart and strong faith that will help you get through the rough days.
Love you both,
Beverly

Sarah said...

What a beautiful momma you are, Erin! Thanks for sharing your heart with us and know we are celebrating your sweet Enoch and how the Lord will use his precious life! We love you guys and are praying...it's never easy to let them go!

S. said...

Oh Erin, your words have touched my heart! We also have to children already awaiting us and Becca and Ben, in Heaven. Everything is in Gods timing - LOVE YOU!!!!

Bob Clark said...

I'm so sorry for your loss Erin i cried and my mom cried. I've been thinking about you recently. love Tiffany Clark.